How to Choose the Right Coping Strategy

Stress is something we can’t avoid in our everyday lives. Be it from school, work, or our relationships, sometimes situations take an unexpected, challenging turn, potentially causing stress.

But how do we deal with stress? Is there one “right” way to deal with stress? Before that, let’s go through what coping strategy is and learn about the various ways of coping strategies we can choose from.

What is a Coping Strategy?

In short, coping strategy or coping mechanism is the way we choose to deal with challenging or seemingly threatening situations. This can range from terrible traffic that makes you late for work to the loss of a loved one. 

There are so many ways people can cope with stressful situations. While some coping strategies may aim to eliminate the stressor altogether, others may only aim to reduce the uncomfortable emotions that come with the stress, ease the feelings of distress, or may serve as a temporary distraction from the stress.

Some of the ways people can cope with stressful situations, according to Blum, Brow, and Silver (2012) in the Encyclopedia of Human Behavior are:

• Confronting the stressor head-on to remove the stressor,
• Avoiding the stressor and the feelings of distress,
• Detaching yourself from the situation or minimizing its significance,
• Seeking social support, 
• Accepting the situation, or
• Changing their perspective of the situation as a growth-oriented experience.  

Two Types of Coping Strategies

There are many ways people can choose to cope, but all these coping strategies can be divided into four general groups (Moskowitz, 2004). However, the two most commonly known types are problem-based coping and emotion-based coping.

Problem-based coping focuses on the stressor or the problem in a challenging situation. It addresses the problem right away and deals with the ways we can remove the stressor or ourselves from the stressful situation.

Like it says on its name, with emotion-based coping, we first deal with the uncomfortable emotions that come with stress. Emotion-based coping focuses on how we can manage our emotional health in the middle of challenging times.

Let’s take the example of exam week in school. With problem-based coping, you may think of the ways of how to get good grades and sail through the week smoothly. You may focus on making studying flashcards, reviewing your notes regularly, and doing exercises.

You can also deal with exam week with emotion-based coping. While you may also study, you also actively seek ways to make sure you don’t get burnt out. For example, you still take regular breaks while studying and find support from your friends while studying.  

Choosing the Right Way to Cope

From all the different ways to cope, which one is the best? 

When talking about coping mechanisms, there is no “one best way” to cope. The best way is to start from your stressor and the nature of the situation you’re facing. 

When the situation is something you can’t change or is out of your control, such as the loss of a loved one or chronic illness, the focus can be on your emotions. Maintaining your emotional health in such challenging times will be more beneficial as it helps you to accept the situation better, therefore reducing the stress you may feel. 

On the other hand, when the stressor is something you can change or get out of, like an impending assignment deadline or a project at work, you may choose problem-based coping instead. Tackling the issue right away, by looking for more effective ways to manage the project or dedicating your time to finish the assignment, will help you get rid of the stressor more easily.

Oftentimes, the best coping method combines both problem-based and emotion-based strategies. For example, talking to Reyo while going through difficult times can help you manage your emotions better by getting the support you need. It can also help you solve your problem more easily by getting feedback about your situation and advice on how to deal with it better.

Choosing the right coping strategy is all about getting to know yourself better. By assessing how you feel and identifying the cause, you’ll naturally find the best way to deal with this stressful situation. 

References:

Blum, S., Brow, M., & Silver, R. C. (2012). Coping.

Moskowitz, J. (2004). Coping: Pitfalls and promise. Annual Review of Psychology, 55, 745-774.